Molly Paris
Civil Rights Attorney
Challenge: Act as a sounding board for upcoming career changes
Molly has been my friend for nearly thirty years. Unlike many other people I’ve worked with, Molly’s challenge didn’t come down to articulating something on paper, but rather in her own mind. As an attorney, she’s a capable writer and didn’t need that kind of help but I could see her struggling with dissatisfaction in her job and I could tell she was coming to a crossroads whether she wanted to or not. So we talked through various aspects of her work and after listening to what she did and didn’t like, I prompted her to ask herself a series of questions. Eventually, she crafted a strategy and took a step that has led her back to satisfaction and pride in her professional life. The nature of her work is inherently prone to wearing people down, especially people who feel things deeply as she does. Knowing ourselves in terms of what we like or don’t like and what works or doesn’t work in our lives is half the challenge. This self-knowledge is can inform our choices and ensure that we’re moving in a direction that will lead to greater happiness.
Molly’s Testimonial
For over 20 years, I have been a civil rights lawyer. I come from a family of big hearts and left-wing politics so it was never a question what I would do. I have always been passionate about my craft and have no hesitation when it comes to fighting for the rights of others. I forged ahead and one day realized…. I’m tired. I can’t do this anymore, but this is the only thing I know how to do. I was at a job that was crossing boundaries and wearing me down. I did the only thing I know how to do when I face any type of professional or personal crossroads… I called Jen. For purposes of full disclosure, Jen has been my friend for decades, so this was not the first call of this type. However, this one was different – I was about to walk away from the law and my mental and emotional wellbeing was beginning to suffer. I did not need help writing or putting together a fancy résumé – I have those in hand. I am trained as a writer, so I had plenty of résumés, federal court writing samples, and reference letters. What I needed was to craft a plan mentally to somehow get back on track – embrace what I love doing for a living without it driving me into a state of exhaustion and apathy.
Without even having to ask, Jen said, “Well it looks like we need a plan.” We talked through the ideas and parsed out what I needed to prioritize. Jen asked me the questions I never bothered to ask myself… “What type of clients make you happy? What’s the cause you believe in most? What is crushing your soul? What makes you want to fight harder? What do you want your days to look like?” Armed with answers to these questions, I picked up the phone. I sent e-mails. I called a former colleague who I trusted, and he said, “We have a place for you.” He told me about the needs of the organization and asked what I was most interested in taking on. Previously, I would have just said (to myself of course), “I hate my job just give me a new one.” We talked it through.
I have always told my clients – especially children who have been abused or neglected - that when they have an opportunity to tell their story to the judge, to explain it as beautifully and eloquently as they just explained it to me, and they will be heard. That’s what Jen said to me and when it was my turn, and I was able to be heard. I absolutely love my current job. I can advocate for people who need my voice while listening to my own voice. I had not been this happy in my career for years. All I needed was to craft a plan, but I could not have done so without Jen.